When Winners become Dinners.

Cannibals. It's hard to put a positive spin on it. I've tried. Take the fellows pictured above. Nice boys, I'm sure. But for all the in-depth lab work they have enjoyed in Anatomy Class these Cannibals still don't seem to understand which side of the body the spine is located on. It's unforgivable, really. If we are what we eat one can only say these Cannibals have not been eating Phi Beta Kappas.
As the topic of my impending travels to New Guinea have come up in conversation over the last several months, so too has that of Cannibals, synonymous, it seems, with that part of the world. Many people have asked if I will be bringing some form of protection. It goes without saying anything truly effective would be disallowed by TSA. Further, our lack of a common language precludes the possibility of psychological Judo. But the clear advantage is mine, as there is no way these people could know I was a wrestling champion in Jr. High. I am fairly sure they will be taken by surprise when I put a double arm-bar walkover on the first of their numbers. I have not worked up a plan for what I will do after that.
Not to worry. There is very little Cannibalism to be found these days. Missionaries, who first came to New Guinea in the 1870's, have successfully persuaded the native peoples to love thy brother in a less culinary sense. Various occupying forces since time have proven equally convincing. In 2007, a tribe in Papua New Guinea formally apologized for killing and eating four British missionaries in 1878. Though this atrocity was committed by ancestors several generations ago it is considered significant on their path toward second world status that these former Cannibals should declare "Our bad."
Yet it would be incorrect to suggest, as I have in an earlier post, that Cannibalism no longer exists in New Guinea. The Korowai of southeastern Papua have been reported to practice ritual cannibalism up to the present day. A 60 Minutes episode filmed in 2006 documented this practice. I also found an interview with a cannibal on U-tube. Imagine that.  A British crew spoke with one member of a Korowai war party via translator. The native described human flesh as tasting like pig. People, the other other white meat.
But the Korowai are located many unfriendly tribes and several hundred miles away from the area we will be trekking through. We are not worried and I encourage you, dear Reader, to not be either. The bulk of our journey will travel through the tribal lands of the Dani, a native people who long ago abandoned the abhorrence of cannibalism for the sweet sweet taste of cash. With a vested interest in seeing our safe return, the Dani natives we will hire as Porters can be relied upon to serve as both passport and protector. Milton Friedman would be pleased.